The New York Jets Are Good, a Sure Sign the Apocalypse Is Here

A chronic NFL punchline delivers an upset of Buffalo and soars into the playoff picture. Beware, Earth.

Jets quarterback Zach Wilson celebrates after a 20-17 win over the Buffalo Bills. Mike Stobe/Getty Images

Are you ready to live in a world where the Jets capably win football games?

I’m not. I’m already on the record with my professional anxiety about the Jets ever becoming a quality football franchise. Not because I have anything against the Jets, whom I feel a personal affection for, like the way I appreciate a misspelled road sign, or a curious squirrel that gets a used yogurt cup stuck on its head. 

As a hack who loves NFL comedy, I need the Jets to stay terrible, because…I really need the material. 

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